She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
