let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
