Sorry, I don't speak sober.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Randomize
