is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
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