Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize