Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
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