i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
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