i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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