How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Randomize
