Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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