wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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