Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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