sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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