we have officially mastered the walk of shame
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
