FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
And then the night went full on bisexual.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
