Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Randomize
