Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
