dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
