I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Randomize
