I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
