imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Randomize