drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
