I'd wear matching sweaters with you
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
