weddingsv make me drug and hornr
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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