Only a mothe r could love this liver
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Randomize
