Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
