Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Randomize
