what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
