Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Randomize
