i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
