you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Randomize