its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
