problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
