: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
