Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
