the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
We need to feng shui this bitch.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize
