Dual....:-)
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
