Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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