I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize
