Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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