Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
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