I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Houston, we have a squirter
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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