I need help removing her.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
The air was thick with penises
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Randomize
