Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Randomize
