Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
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