So drunk its hurt
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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