D3 body, D1 cock
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
