I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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