Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
