He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize