i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Also, beer. Big fan.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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